Whoopi Goldberg Signs Multi-Year Contract With ABC

(RoyalPatriot.com )- Great news America! The Hollywood Reporter revealed last week that ABC Television and Whoopie Goldberg have just reached a deal to keep her on as one of the cackling witches of Macbeth hosts of the View for another four years.

It’s a shame Impeachment isn’t an option here.

Other than angry, vitriolic attacks at Trump, Republican lawmakers and the half of the country who don’t vote Democrat, what exactly does Whoopie Goldberg bring to The View that ABC Television thinks is so valuable?

One thing is certain. Whoopie isn’t being kept on because of her whip-smart political analysis. After all, she’s the dope who suggested Jill Biden, EdD, be appointed as her husband’s Surgeon General. Because, you know, everybody calls Jill DOCTOR.

Whoopie is proof that, for some women, menopause never ends.

It is unclear how much money ABC is offering to pay this loudmouth crank who chased off John McCain’s daughter Meghan for having the temerity not to be as much of a Leftist loudmouth as Whoopie and Joy Behar. The details of this 4-year deal are not being divulged.

What remains inexplicable to most sentient human beings, however, is that The View is the ratings leader for daytime talk shows. Which is rather peculiar considering it isn’t so much a talk show as it is a “shriek at Republicans” show.

Though it is possible what makes The View such a daytime hit has less to do with actual viewers and more to do with people leaving the TV on during the day so their pets don’t get lonely when they’re at work.

Oddly enough, The View’s audience size dropped a bit after Meghan McCain left the show – leading some to suspect that women were tuning in just to watch the cat fights between Meghan and Whoopie.

The question is, now that The View is eschewing even nominally conservative hosts like McCain and Whoopie won’t have anyone to scream at, will these viewers remain loyal?

Well, now that they’re stuck with another four years of Angry Whoopie, there’s plenty of time to test that theory.